Beyond the Court: Volleyball is Coach Hemingway’s Light in the Darkness

By Kelsey Burr

 

ORLANDO, Fla. (July 9, 2024) – Coaching volleyball is more than just a hobby or career for Kari Muma Hemingway. Her team, Apex 14u Blue out of Decatur, Illinois, is the light that keeps her going during the dark moments of life. 

 

Two years ago, she came home from a volleyball tournament completely depleted and struggled to do everyday tasks. What she thought was just a sinus infection turned out to be much more. 

 

After being in the hospital for around 15 days, enduring multiple tests and treatments, she was finally connected with a hematologist who gave her the worst news possible – she had blood cancer.

 

“It's called multiple myeloma. It mutates your plasma cells from inside your bone marrow and then you get sores on your bones and body gets weak. There's no known cure right now. So, you just manage and fight. It's been two and a half years of struggles,” Kari said. 

 

Kari is now on an aggressive form of chemo with multiple treatments a week, but she credits her players for keeping her positive. She’s coached multiple players for over four years now, creating a strong bond.

 

“Being with that group gives you some motivation to keep things going. A little bit of light in your everyday life. I mean, the biggest thing is you have to find something to keep your mind off of the constant doctor’s appointments, the constant pill popping and the infusions, and just find joy,” Kari said. “There are days when I coach from a chair, and then you have good days when you can walk and you can get out there and be active with them, but you can't sit at home and not do anything because those are dark days.”

 

A Beloved Coach

 

Kari got into coaching through her daughters. Initially, she was a volleyball mom, taking her daughters to games and lessons, helping them with drills, and volunteering for scorebook duties before eventually taking on a team of her own. 

 

“She went from not knowing a lot to kind of just being immersed in the full experience,” Alicia Greene, Kari’s oldest daughter and coach of Apex Volleyball Club in Texas, said. “It was fun to see her grow continuously and ask questions.”

 

The mom and daughter duo recently got to see each other in action at the 2024 AAU Junior National Volleyball Championships.

 

“It’s exciting to be able to get to see her and her girls and vice versa for her to see me with my team. We don’t get a lot of time to just see each other, with being in Illinois and Texas, so anytime we can meet, and especially at a volleyball tournament, that’s always a plus,” Alicia said.

 

Becoming a coach was the right move, as Kari has made an immense impact on her girls and their parents as both a coach and a person.

 

“You can always talk to her and tell her what's going on. She's going to listen to you and she's going to try to make things right. She's improved me too,” said Rikeya Harper, one of Kari’s players.

 

“I enjoy having her coaching me. She makes it super fun to be at practices and she doesn't tear us down at all,” Aliyah Jayne, another player, added.

 

Kim Beals, Apex’s ‘team mom’, also sings Kari’s praises.

 

“I just want people to know how dedicated to these kids she is. She never lets these kids down, she goes beyond what a normal coach would do like packing lunches and food so they eat healthy, always looking for ways to push the kids further,” Beals said.

 

At the end of the 2022 season, the team surprised Coach Kari with a special jersey, which featured a red ribbon and her initials on the sleeve, to show their support for her. She was also selected as the recipient of Apex’s "Coach of The Year" award that year.

 

“It surprised me. I don't personally feel any different than any other coach,” Kari said. “You just go and you teach the girls the best you can and you try to be understanding and motivating and a positive influence. And then they come back with something like that…I mean there's no words, no way to describe how that makes you feel.”

 

Kari’s daughter Alicia was not surprised at all about her mother’s honors.

 

“She is the most giving person I’ve ever met. She will make sure everybody else is OK before herself. But that just makes her such an awesome person. She loves hard. She cares hard. And she’s a fighter. She’s been through a lot and she doesn’t give up,” Alicia said. “She’s God’s gift to us, honestly. She’s our little sparkling gem and we try to protect her.”

 

A Shift in Focus

 

While volleyball will always be a part of her life, Kari is now shifting her focus to do something she despises – prioritizing herself. This year’s AAU Junior National Volleyball Championship was her last tournament as a coach, which was an extremely difficult decision.

 

“Just the realization that my body is failing. I don’t enjoy having to cancel things on the girls or showing up with half strength,” Kari explained of her decision. “If I can’t be 100 percent in their life, then I just need to step back and be 100 percent in my life to make it last.”

 

Kari said the team’s goal at the tournament was just to enjoy the experience. 

 

“Wins and losses are extra. We're here to be a team and be a family. One last big show before they have a new coach next year,” Kari said. “We're not from a town that sends people to things like this all the time, so, being here and the first one from our club ever to be at AAU is exciting.”

 

Alicia thinks her mom made the right decision, even though she knows it wasn’t easy. 

 

“It’s in her personality to give, but at this point you’ve got to kind of give to yourself,” Alicia said. “We’ll be able to see each other more, so I’m excited for that.”

 

Kari hopes her players know how much they mean to her. 

 

“To my players, I love you. And I’m sorry I’m not coming back full-time next year, but I need to be strong. To the other battle-hardened warriors, just find your motivation and keep going.”